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The Great Unknown

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I went for a walk with some of the ranch employees under the stars down a dirt road tonight. We were walking in the black of starlight. Coming back I realized how fortunate I was to be on a casual stroll near one of the seven natural wonders of the world, Grand Canyon. I mentioned some of my stories that I sometimes fear to tell, and my co-workers started to listen; then they grew uncomfortable as I started going into detail. So I remained quiet, and ponder the mysteries of the landscape on my own. So many folks fear the …

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One Expensive Mistake

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It is exhilarating to live far from the fenced confines of the “sophisticated’ modern world. The Grand Canyon is a mystery. It is far from the reality of the miserable suit and tie people. This morning I flew into the canyon by chopper, with a pilot named Rahn. We were supposed to pick up river runners on the Colorado. They never showed up. We sat down there for an hour and a half, visiting, waiting, talking about religion, life, and our different views on the existance of God. We decided to fly up the river to see if there were any rafts headed our way. It turns out …

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Living in Isolation

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I’m out living, working, and breathing isolation every day now. My life is far from a phony reality that once enslaved my poor spirit. I’m on the edge of the enourmous Grand Canyon now and hear the  wind, and the lonesome happy singing of gentle ravens gliding along buttes of Hermit Shale, Toroweap Sandstone, and Kiabab Limestone. The Creosote bushes span as far as the horizon. So many cacti cover the lower portions of the Canyon; three species of Prickly Pear, Hedgehog Cactus, Barrel Cactus, and Fishhook Cactus. Spanish Bayonet, also known as Banana Yucca intermix with creosote, sage, Ephedra Bush, and Desert Holly. Jimson Weed (Datura) grows everywhere, around the ranch, over by the hen …

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Billy the Kid

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Tomorrow morning I leave to go back to Northern Arizona. I have to  say hello to Billy the Kid, our live-in road runner who isn’t afraid of people. We feed him live mice which he whips around and swallows. It’s back to visiting the Grand Canyon every day and getting paid for it. The nights out there are quite rare. Even in rural Utah, the stars don’t stick out as boldly as they do there. At night we have frogs croaking, desert pack rats moving about, and so many different insects making noise besides crickets. It almost feels like your …

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Black Rock Wasteland

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Death glistens in the desert like a mirage, spectors in the diffused shade. The sun adds a strange glow to the heat. It has pulled them out into the open. They spend dangerous amounts of time away from their towns in the crevices. The ghosted wind moves the Creosote and I hear whisperings in the silence. They hunt and gather in smeltering black seas. Dust devils sweep by in dreams.

Heart of the Great Basin

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The stars stand bold against trees. The fire is dancing. The smoke drifts in my direction and soaks into my skin. This is a quiet moment in the Great Basin; where the little people roam the night. These individuals are knee tall. They move through the juniper mountains like ants. I can hear their whisperings, as they work in busy networks… preparing for what may come this way, someday… The thunder storms of summer claim these valleys and the thunderheads are in control. Bolts of lightning draw near, and slam the earth. At night the sky seems to clear, but …

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Working on the Arizona Strip

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My new life began on the Arizona Strip about a week and a half ago. I’m working 8-9 miles from the inner gorge of the Grand Canyon at Bar10 ranch. The Arizona Strip is one of the most isolated places in the United States, and it has been called the Tibet of North America, because it is one of the most uninhabited places by human population. The problem lays in the fact there is no water on the strip except for a few springs here and there. The Heatons own this ranch, which spans about 250,000 acres large. They have …

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The Landscape and its History

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That subliminal quiet is stirred only by ancient winds. The rocks are timeless, squared away to outlast the human element. Passing through Juniper I observe enormous balloon clouds hovering over the tips of the mountains. Looking out across the valley below, I see the rust stained foothills where one of Southwestern Utah’s largest petroglyph sites lay, a place known as the Parowan Gap. Some say the ageless writing spans 12,000 years ago in age. I’ve heard that the Paiutes say that they were written by the Creator. Others say they were inscribed by tribes coming from the far east on …

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My New Pal, Jesse James!

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I have somewhat a little announcement to make. It’s not a big deal to many, but for me, it was. I’ve been living a solitary life for the passed 4-5 years without much responsibility but myself to care for. Things have changed though, I finally went and found me a dog and named him Jesse, after Jesse James… He’s a blue heeler, english pointer mix. I’ve had him for over two weeks now, which puts him roughly at 8 weeks old. He was born on a farm on the outskirts of Provo, Utah, where I was staying to visit relatives. …

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The Clouds Know

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Four days ago, after weeks of cloudless blue sky, I finally grew tired of the intense heat and asked the rain clouds to return to the land. It seems they heard me… Two days ago when I first saw the return of the clouds, I was so brilliantly happy, and relieved to see a possible end of the relentless bone dry days of summer. Then last night, the rain fell so hard on our ranch house, I couldn’t ignore the beautiful pounding raindrops splashing. I opened the sliding door and let the droplets try to invade the house and I …

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Is Blogging Still the Thing?

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Man, is it just me or are things kind of dying down in the blogging world? Some blogs I visit haven’t been getting as much attention as they used to. I don’t get as many travelers stopping through here any more, yet I’ve won some awards for my writing, and even a scholarship for a poem. It’s kind of nice though, because this space has become like a personal journal once more. I’m starting to write more material that I wouldn’t have mentioned otherwise. I’ve learned my lesson of posting articles to the more traffic-chocked collaborative weblogs, realizing that I don’t like …

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Looking Back

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It hits like a freight train, I get this uncanny urge to wander off into the mountains. It builds up like water against a weak dam. When I try to describe this to some family members, it angers them. When I was in high school, some of my friends thought I might be suicidal when I would venture into the wilderness, alone. On one occasion they went looking for me, because of this. At first I was surprised that they would consider this, but grateful that they cared enough to do so. Maybe people thought I was shy? In reality; …

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The Shadows of the Land

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i am leaving home to join my soul, the wild. leaving my loved-ones for earth’s darkness. the universe sings forever. the desert calls. i’ve been patient in my planning. no one really hears the mysteries, or why the heavens weep. The land’s transforming. old ways dance in my heart. my spirit is fiery. the horizon waits. i’ll find the place where nothing ever sleeps. tonight, i pack travel food and journey into the desert. the wind whipped wasteland is glistening. my dreams haunt bottomless basin mountains. my heart is in the tower of stars. the desert is calling. in this …

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Yes, I believe in him

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I just moved from Saint George, Utah, back to Parowan – Which I heard means Evil Waters to the Southern Paiute. Anyways, there’s stories around here of a hairy man, especially over by Enterprise Utah. I avoid certain parts of that country when going in alone… There’s an extreme feeling of melencholy there, because of a massacre site known as the Mountain Meadows Massacre, where Mormons killed over 200 people that were passing through back in the 19th century. My grandpa has a bigfoot story, and he says the creature moved around him taking strides longer then that of a …

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Dreaming of the Afterlife

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A boy sat outside the village looking at the grave yard at the mesa’s edge. “What ever happened to the dead?” he pondered. “Are they living some where else far away?” Skeletons walking around after the day turns to night inspires the boy to dream of the darkness and deepness of rivers. “Are the dead living somewhere else?” Out on the mesa edge he prays every morning. He prays, waiting for the sun to come up; to come over and talk to him. Every night, he dreams of the medicine that will make him dead. He wants to go see …

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The Early Morning

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dark rain clouds wander the blue sky making the dream come alive a vision of the land singing Then cries the raven from its hollow in the knarled tree that twists its branches into the ancient wind Thunder echoes way across the desert yonder farther than the eyes can see The black rock was the blood of that ancient beast that was slain so long ago the locust begin buzzing and an eagle heralds the dawn when that sun peaks up over the rim of mountains the clouds catch pink-red rays The old man pulls up his trousers because of …

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In Support of Immigration

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Why are Americans so paranoid about illegal immigration? Americans need to stop and think about their own roots… I know of a T-shirt that reads; “Ask an American Indian what they think of illegal immigration!” Think about the hypocrisy Americans have towards illegal immigration, when some of our own ancestors were illegal invaders to this continent. A lot of these “illegal” immigrants are indigenous people that were here long before Columbus set foot. These Mexicans are risking their lives and dying out in the desert for what I have. That is an indicator helping me realize how privileged I am …

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Elbow Canyon Excursion

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the Hard blue sky on a hot day tires me, under the sweltering bright fire of the sun. I’ve been on this dirt trail for hours inside a cab that lacks basic air conditioning. I started my journey crawling slowly through a valley of creosote southeast of Littlefield, Arizona. It is about 1000 feet above sea level. I was heading towards the mountains that border the western flank of high desert known as the Arizona Strip country. I approach Elbow Canyon, which is one of the rockiest roads I have taken this rig on; jagged and short switchbacks lead all …

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Changes

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I am wondering through what beauty is left… There is hardly a place to go where man has not intruded. Everything is changing. I dream of what happened long ago. What was Earth like then? There is a divine power today, not all is gone. I believe that the sky and the landscape will change. People will have no part in it, if they are not worthy. Strange things come to me on the wind. The sun in this quiet world is talking to me. The Earth is helping me dream too. The ravens are excited, and chatter the news …

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Voices of the Past

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“The mountains are the last things that are remaining old and undisturbed, but even now we are building things into them. I still can go in them, camp out and watch the stars; sleep and dream in the night by an old fire; and wonder some where else other than this realm of confusion. It truly is something simple, easy, and very righteous. It is being alone and hearing the voices of the past…” I composed this in my late teens, around the time I turned eighteen and was graduating from high school. You could say I was pretty lucky …

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Heart of a Resistant Land

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It is gusty tonight, as the fiery sun sinks into the western mountains Stars flood heavens deep The ancient desert sings The voice of the mountain wails through the pinion singing with the streams of yellow grass and sage The basin below is cold and dusty The mountain wind moves all night The Coyotes run the midnight hills yipping and howling in the heart of this resistant land Never to be taken! Nothing is controlled Nothing can rob the soul of the wild

My Destiny

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No person will hinder me from venturing into shadow creeping into the deeper wild where the wind sings ageless further ‘n further away from my captors …the wraiths of civilization No individual will persuade me from the call of creation forward, into beauty of earth and sky.

Storms of Summer, Finally Here

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The drumming rain surrounds the little adobe this summer eve. In the morning the rising sun soaks the clouds in radiant light. The sun finally breaks from shadow, and dark golden light warms the window. Just before everything awakens, I take a morning stroll smelling the wet sage and creosote. The red rock landscape is burning fire red in morning twilight. Thunderclouds hug the mountains in the distance. All these mourning doves have made their encampment around my quarters, enclosed by a few cottonwood. Around 8 or 9 P.M. a mourning dove flies into the door hatch and pokes its …

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Another Small Victory

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Tonight, when I checked my email, I was pleasantly surprised! One of my poems; A Spring Desert Dawn won second place in a scholarship competition for Dixie State College. It’s actually the first time that I’ve ever attempted to submit something to a literary journal, except to a few online journals.. So this gives me a little hope as to whether I should pursue this little endeavor more. As a writer, I consider my work mostly free verse and experimental.

Pondering Further…

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The wilderness has been my only true friend. Through every trial, it is always there, listening. There is no hostility in the wild. The earth is beautiful, and quiet. No noise, except the mourning dove coming into your camp on an early spring morn, and the river roaring continually, and it has been making noise long before humans. Why did God, Creator, make me human? That is the question I ponder sometime, Why did he make me human?

And So I Ponder…

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Man, today, I really feel on edge, like things are not working out like they should? Somewhere along the line, I made a simple mistake, and now watch things unfold and move away from reach. Sometimes it is very hard to communicate with other humans, and I should just stop worrying for a while. My parents came down to Saint George, and spent a few days down here with me. It is hard to see them go every time, because I want to be near my loved ones. My brother is coming back from New York, this August, and we …

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With Little Sleep…

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Today, I came off an abnormally high plane of ecstasy that wasn’t expected. I’m still just extra happy today? First off, I went and purchased a new pair of shoes. My old ones were battered, and they have survived since I was in Flagstaff. Those good shoes met their end in the garbage can just outside of Target. Walking home, there were enormous spring thunderheads over Saint George with patches of dark blue sky. These new shoes are very comfortable and I had four hours of sleep, last night; maybe this is the recipe? Anyways, I’m getting closer to having …

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Phantoms of the Night

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Way off in those mountains, Phantoms are better left unknown. The sun descends beneath the large red mesa, The clouds soak the sunset glare. It is silent, except for the thunderstorm. A beautiful purple thunderhead expands, Blue lightning ignites and echoes. Hear the wind, and the rain falling On the sandstone mesa. Smell the sage. In the foothills, the wind whips the juniper jungle. There is a feast; an unearthly celebration going on. They are busy, tonight, somewhere in those hills. They dance and shift in dark caves. In cobweb networks they sing.

Sun in a Quiet World

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I travel far from the city. I leave the colony. I am moving away from this community of people. They all struggle as I do. I am apart of them in their world. They are wired like me. There’s no escaping the machine. Yet, every trip away from the colony becomes one little victory over the machine. If you head to the mountains, alone, and stay out there long enough, it starts to change you. I’ve gone into the wild enough that I have many stories and experiences to share with my children, and grand children, if I am still …

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My Shipwrecked 4×4

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There’s something a lot worse than a throw-out bearing going out on my 1987 Suzuki. I went a had a shop look over my rig today, and it turns out my worst fears came tp light. The manual transmission needs replacement, on top of an new clutch, and throw-out bearing. This is stressful, because I’m not going anywhere until this is taken care of. So I am short on funds, and it’s time to get creative. A used transmission is going to cost around $200-450 dollars, and the total cost of repair is going to be $600-1000 dolalrs. When buying …

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